It's a timeless question we all ask ourselves throughout our lifetimes
Knowing where you are in the scheme of things is a good start.
Fortunately for us, a lot of research has taken place down thru the ages to help us gain a better idea of who we are, so that we won't have to waste too many years finding ourselves in our tiny part of the Universe. Some 40 centuries ago in Greece there was a temple of Delphi where on one of it's walls was written, "Know Thyself". So you are not alone in this quest. This site has been set up to help mentor anyone who is struggling inside their own head with their identity and may be resorting to alcohol or drugs to escape those nagging uncertainties and to cope with their anxieties.
Site Navigation at the upper right
The picture of the Milky Way Galaxy above shows us about where we live. We call it earth. Although our problems may look huge to us, in the grand scheme of things they really may not be as large as we may believe. The culture where we live and grow up and the people in our neighborhood will play a big part in forming our self image in our early years. By teens and puberty much will change. But with some guidance we may be able to better understand ourselves and learn to better deal with our issues. If you are really messed up it may be wise to seek counseling, and it is available to anyone who seeks it. Those who have done that will often speak of the difference it has made in their lives. But the mission of this website is to offer some helpful resources for you to begin to find yourself and some informational insights to better understand your world and others in it. Much of who you believe yourself to be comes from the interaction with other people so it is important that we all make good friends who will be honest with us. Then become a supportive friend to ourselves and our friends.
Possibly the most difficult time in our younger lives is the years in Jr High School or Middle School. It is tough even for the teachers. Remember a child is said to know half of what it will know in it's life time by the age of 4. And three quarters of that by the time it is 7 to 8 years old. Yet the human brain is not thought to be fully mature until mid 20's. Some of the scientist who research these matters believe it may be as late as the early 30's. Either way we are all works in progress. So if you are in mid teens to mid twenties and things are messed up and you feel all is lost, it isn't all that uncommon. The (pre) frontal cortex of the brain in those years hasn't fully developed yet. Thus the craziness we find ourselves in may lead us to feel we have ruined our lives forever, that we're a bad person, and the negative stuff we hear from others can make us feel like failures. Sometimes the best we can do is to forgive ourselves and move on putting the past behind us and then vow to ourselves to try and do better in the future.
There are those who question if their gender is the reason. According to Dr. Louann Bizendine in her books, "The Male Brain", and "The Female Brain" there are physical differences in these two brains and it does make a difference. It all starts when a male sperm cell, which is either male or female, unites with the female ovum or egg which is of neither gender unite. The sperm cell, if female, will carry two X chromosomes and if male will carry an X & Y chromosome. This will program the female body to form a fetus or baby which will in the first part of it's development have neither male or female characteristics. But much is going on that isn't visible yet. It will take nine weeks or more before an ultrasound will reveal the gender of the unborn. If it is a male baby, the water the baby is in inside the mother is rich with testosterone. This will form the male brain quite differently. Ask any woman who has had children of both genders and most will tell you they knew they were carrying a boy when they were pregnant. Once born, however, the boy won't have any significant testosterone again until puberty and it will bring even more changes in him then. And again, this will be happening before his brain is fully developed. So if you are a young girl trying to cope with your own issues and finding yourself while trying to cope with boys at the same time, it can be exasperating. It's no more fun for a guy either when so many adults think he should be a man at fifteen with good reasoning skills and accountable for himself and a confused female partner who is only beginning to look like a woman at this age.
We've looked at knowing where we're from can effect our finding ourselves and how our early environment or neighborhood could influence the way we feel about ourselves. The people around us there, our most trusted friends & family, and the early years in school will all have it's impact on us too. Looking further back to what was going on before we were even born will have it's influence on the question of, "Who Am I" ?
Understand, these quizzes are not IQ test in any way. They are only to help you learn more about yourself.
Note: If any of the green "Links" don't work, just copy paste the link above them into your browser and hit enter.
So then, lets explore a battery of resources that can give us some hints about who we are, what we may be best cut out for and even the types of people we may best fit in with. This could begin to offer some relief from the confusion, unhappiness, or pent up anger that may be holding us back from reaching our full potential. This is all free to use and when you start it would be good to have a note book to record your results in. Remember, you may take these test more than once and you should wait a few months before you take them again. You may notice your results will vary from time to time so by recording them you can average them out over the years. We are all works in progress and what we seem to be now may be different in the coming years. Don't worry over your results. Nobody fails. This isn't school.
Scientist suggest we have a second brain. It is our gut and it is directly connected to our brain by a nerve system known as the Vagas nerve. The food we take in with our diet will have direct influence on the state of our brain. So the expression, "you are what you eat" should be kept in mind regarding your nutrition. This is a big part in solving the question of who we are.
With this information lets look at better understanding who we are. All people have needs. These needs will be part of defining who we are as they reveal our behaviors. Abraham Maslow, a psychologist, developed a theory classifying these needs in an order much like a set of five stair steps. You can't skip any of these steps going up or coming back down. (read about it in the link below) Understanding this is key to learning who we are at various stages of our lives. This is not a test, just information. When very young we have basic needs, as we mature we have psychological needs, and as we further age our needs are to self actualize in order to reach our full potential.
https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-maslows-hierarchy-of-needs-4136760
Our needs help all of us relate to each other. We all have something we need and things we can exchange with others to satisfy our mutual needs. It's what makes the world go around. In ancient times we just traded goods or our services with each other. There was no money like we have today. This trading was called "Barter" and we still use it some today. In those times we may not have had something to trade with at the time for the service or goods we needed. So we had our word of honor so that when we did get that which we offered to trade we would see to it that it was delivered to our trading partner immediately and our debt was resolved. That would assure our word of honor was dependable. Like a good credit rating.
As people traded and worked together they realized they could fit in with some people better than others. This was when we began to realize what "Personalities" were and how they influenced things. Many early systems sought to explain personalities such as Astrology. But Dr Carl Jung developed a test where his theory held that everyone could be fit into sixteen broad types of personalities. His test has been modified by others but his is still a classic. This can be a big step in learning more about who you are, and you should take it two or three times a year recording your results. Then average them. Your results will be given as four letters which place you into any of the sixteen types. So take the test when you are calm and collected and don't hurry. (it is free and the sixteen types are explained at the right side of the page).
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
Here is a cartoon illustration site showing the sixteen types that may be fun to look thru. You will notice there are four categories each with four types under each category.
https://www.16personalities.com/personality-types
A later revision to the Jung Typology Test is the Enneagram Personality Test. You may want to take this test and compare your results with the Jung Test. Again, record your result and take the test again later in the year.
https://www.truity.com/test/enneagram-personality-test
A lot of us are concerned about how intelligent we are when trying to figure out who we are. It is held that there are nine types of intelligence and we all have varying amounts of each kind. Here is a test to help map out where your intelligence types are.
https://www.literacynet.org/mi/assessment/findyourstrengths.html
An explanation of the nine types of intelligence here
https://blog.adioma.com/9-types-of-intelligence-infographic/
The "Who Am I" test. Designed to give insights into your personality. It is based on another test which is not free. This is a bit easier to understand also.
https://you.visualdna.com/quiz/whoami?utm_source=WAI-picture-VDNA#!/quiz#%2Fquiz
Your work values (work ethic) test. You will be working with all types of people during your life time and your orientation towards work will say much about you to others. And the feedback you get from your coworkers will influence both who you think you are and how others see you.
https://www.123test.com/work-values-test/
All of us work at something to make a living. Some are self employed and others work for businesses along with many other coworkers. But we will all have coworkers we would rather not have to work with if we can prevent it. Those are our least preferred coworkers. And yes, there is a test to help us figure out the kind of coworkers they would be. And that helps us learn more about who we are.
https://cyfar.org/sites/default/files/Least_PreferredCoworkerScale.pdf
The "Disc Test" helps to reveal some basic qualities in each of our personalities. Dominance, Influence, Steadiness, and Compliance. All of us have some of each of these and at different amounts. These are key qualities that help to make up who we are. Remember, all of these things will change thru our life times. Time, experience, military service, becoming a mom or dad etc all will cause changes from teens onward into our older ages.
https://www.123test.com/disc-personality-test/
The Holland Profile Test is designed to help us identify which occupations we would be best suited to. The idea is to match your personality to the most appropriate career tracks. We will all be good at more than one thing in life. As Will Rogers, "the cowboy philosopher" once said, "we're all smart, just on different subjects". In truth we are all better than we think we are. This is because most of us are our own worst critics in life. Especially when we are isolated from others. While we may be good at accurately realizing the things that trouble us, if we tend to distort our observations it can cause us more trouble. If we have close friends to discuss these matters with it can help to refine a more accurate understanding. Without friends we can seek counsel with, we often become more critical of ourselves.
https://www.123test.com/career-test/
The Lusher Color Test is a unique kind of test. You choose colors you like. It is quick and simple and can reveal insights into the state of one's mind. And this help us further understand who we are at the time we take it. Again, take this and other test here a few times a year and record your results. You will notice a change in them most likely.
https://psycho-tests.com/test/lusher-color
Something all of us do without realizing it as we interact with others is to Flirt. We often call it charm, persuasion, influence, and other words all meaning the same thing. Those who are good at it are said to have a winning personality. But it is a key trait in assessing who we are and how we get on in life. It's how we go about connecting with others in a broader sense. And the better or more easily we can connect with others the more likely we will be to form a healthy identity. And when we are feeling more up beat and self confident the easier this social skill becomes.
https://www.zoo.com/quiz/what-is-your-flirting-style
Your "Birth Order", will have much to say about who you are. Are you an "Only" ? A "First Born" ? A "Middle Kid" ? A "Last Born" ? People born in each of these brackets will have qualities remarkably similar to others in their same bracket. This quiz will reveal some of this for you and in doing so will give you insights as to who you are.
https://www.webmd.com/parenting/rm-quiz-birth-order
So on reflecting on the image of the Milky Way Galaxy at the top of this page, one of the key qualities of knowing who we are is knowing where we stand in our family, relationships with others, in our neighborhood or community. As human beings we are social animals and it is important that we have contact with others. When single and on our own it can be more difficult. The test and information above should help to better understand yourself so that you may be better able to seek out those best suited to you in that endeavor. Good luck and best wishes
Once we have these understandings, we need to look for our best suited career possibilities. If we live in a small community where there isn't much opportunity we owe it to ourselves to look for areas where we can find new vista's unknown where we lived before. Those occupations which may allow us grow and become all that we can be. So if you grew up or are living in a dead end town, it may be best to make your way to a more advanced area where things are happening. By using the internet, these places are easy to find today.
In the words of U.S. Air Force General Jacqueline Van Ovost
"It's hard to be what you can't see"
This site was produced for Jackie Hello Jackie !
All human actions have one or more of these seven human causes: Chance, Nature, Compulsion, Habit, Reason, Passion, and Desire. Aristotle
One isn't born one's self. One is born with a mass of expectations, a mass of other people's ideas - and you have to work thru it all. V. S. Naipau
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Here are a number of free test that can help anyone to gain a better understanding of themselves. It is highly recommended that a note book be kept to record your results each time you take these test so that you can average out your results thru the years. This will help you to form a better understanding of who you are.